A, a forty year old widow sends me, pornographic stories about the men she has been with since her husband passed. I’m moved by them. She ignores my requests to see her to talk about her escapades. Of late, she sends me unedited versions.
B is a loner. she is marginalized and more insecure about me because of it. She worries that I’m as fucked up as she is. She wants me to account for my day. She cleans homes on the Oregon coast.
Some folk with a disease want to avoid folk with the same disease and others feel stronger when they are with their own kind.
G saw a lesbian and rejected her advances when they watched a movie at her house. She has never slept with a woman and thought she would see what it would be like to get to know a lesbian. Her sister is a lesbian. She decided that she only wanted to be friends with the lesbian. I didn’t understand why she pulled a face of disgust when she had somewhat led on the lesbian. I immediately felt that I was one of her victims when she said that it was unlikely I would get to know her. She said she would pay for the second beer but I paid for it. She is extremely beautiful and grave looking like a woman pioneer with a bonnet. She has a very thin masculine mouth and a very long thin masculine nose. She said that she looks like her father, that most children do so the father doesn’t eat them Her voice sounds like a dog choking on its bone.
G’s former bf courted her with furniture, a bedroom and patio set that he removed when she left him because he abused alcohol and prescription drugs.
Holy fucking shit, said G. I had the craziest day. I was so sick. Having diarrhea in the wilderness. My ex bf was such an ass last night. Today he took so much major furniture out of my house.
God you are beautiful, I said.
Haven’t you known an alcoholic, G said.
Well a fifty year old feminist, I said. She got mean and blunt and called me a misogynist when she got drunk. She was used up. Twice divorced.
Oh that sucks, G said.
What did your bf do when he got drunk, I said.
He did bizarre shit, G said.
Men are like dogs, I said.
Yeah, G said. I have dogs. They play with each others penises all day long.
I don’t look at people in terms of gender, G said. I gawked at her long perfect nose. It looked like a penis. I wanted to suck on it. She sat next to me and didn’t turn her head when she talked. She’s used to insulting men and the men not responding in kind and paying for her meals.     G is seeing a Malaysian man who pays for her dinners. She learns things from him, but she isn’t attracted to him.
G only wants to date careerists. She dated a biker and pacifist with zero drive. He refused to argue with her and she likes to argue.
Last night it was another dreary rainy Portland night.  I texted an ugly middle aged woman with beautiful hazel eyes to my salmon adobe apt. We never met in person. When she entered my place she saw I hadn’t cleaned up old plates of food.
These are my daughter’s drawings, I said pointing to the amazing drawings taped to the white wall haphazardly with scotch tape.
I asked her to sit down on my brown couch that had a few chewed up Hawaiian pork ribs in its cushions. She said that she had to go. Her face was pale and drawn.
Do you want to get a beer I said.
Short story: we got a beer at club 21 went back to my place where she sat on my face facing me and mashed my mouth and nose with her noisome vagina. Jesus, she yelped. Oh Jesus lick my pussy. She had a flat ass. Her small droopy breasts and the folds of her belly fat were impossible to tell apart.