I write Nanny 1 a love letter: Dear Nanny 1 thank you for not killing our babies
even though they will grow up to be tyrants and wage war and torture for peace in far away lands and make movies about it.
I’m falling in love with you Nanny 1 said. A writer I respect said not to fall in love.
Nanny 1 wants me to love her how she wants to love me. I think she thinks she can’t fall in love if I don’t encourage her. I love you I love you I love you I say when I can’t take
the pressure.
This moment I have love for you, Nanny I said.
She wants to know what I do with my body when she isn’t with me. My body has a mind of its own and doesn’t like to have to account for itself.
I want to set up house with you, Nanny 1 said.
Nanny 1 has dreams about being surrounded by Nanny 2, 3, 4, 5,.. They tell her how special she is until she breaks down and is remorseful.
Nanny 1 had a baby that was aging faster than the other babies. The baby died when she turned a hundred.
Nanny is writing a novel while editing a novel that is to be published. She wants to have
leisure time and not to work herself to death for fame.
Nanny 1 wants to get away from her roommate. I don’t want to share a life with Nanny 1 if she is a slave to Y like myself. I want her to be free.
Nanny 1 went underground. She creamates nine bodies every day. She works with three ovens. Nameless men who used to be Ikea employees help her lift the bodies.
It takes three hours to burn a body.
Nanny recovered the eyes of a seventy year old man with no body hair. She took a
wrist watch that they forgot to remove. No one ever gave her anything. She
thought that she had a right to what no one wanted.
When Nanny 1 has body parts she sets them up for target practice at the shooting range. The military supplies her with weapons to test. They gave her a strap on laser that is effective.
Nanny’s laughter is redolent of burning flesh.
Nanny 1 went to an AA meeting. The talking heads and broken hearts began to look like the lifeless bodies she works on. It scared her. She hates it when she is scared.
Nothing can hurt me because nothing is real she said to calm herself down.
She looked at a dude she fucked because she felt like it and laughed harder than she had laughed in awhile.
Y recovered five babies from the Nannies to sell to couples on the upper west side.
The Nannies peed on an alcoholic celebrity who had been wanting to fuck them.
They broke his fingers and put him in the trunk of a white chevy and went for a joyride.